The Individualistic Doer

Individualistic Doers are self-assured and very independent people. They are quiet and realistic, very rational, extremely matter of fact people. They strongly cultivate their individualism and enjoy applying their abilities to new tasks. But they are also very spontaneous and impulsive persons who like to follow their sudden inspirations.

Individualistic Doers are good and precise observers who register everything which goes on around them. However, they are not so sensitive as regards interpersonal relations and are surprised when they occasionally rub someone up the wrong way with their direct and blunt manner. They are not particularly fond of obligations; but if you give them space, they are uncomplicated, sociable and cheerful individuals.

Individualistic Doers enjoy challenges - action and the odd kick are simply part of their life. They love tempting fate and many people of this type have risky hobbies such as skydiving or bungee jumping. This also applies to their workday life. Individualistic Doers are in top form in critical situations; they can grasp situations, make decisions and take the necessary steps extremely quickly. Hierarchies and authorities impress them very little; if a superior is not competent, they will have little respect for him. Individualistic Doers like to take on responsibility. They have a marked sense of reality and always find the most suitable and expedient solution for a problem. They resolve conflicts openly and directly; here, they sometimes lack tact but are also very good at taking criticism themselves.

As friends, Individualistic Doers are loyal and devoted; they only have a few friendships but many of them last a lifetime. People enjoy talking to them because of their optimistic attitude to life and their ability to listen. However, they prefer to talk about mutual interests and hobbies rather than about theoretical or philosophical issues - they are not tangible enough for them. They need a lot of freedom and time to themselves in love relationships but, at the same time, they are also very tolerant towards their partners. It happens very seldom that Individualistic Doers fall head over heels in love. They are far too rational. They prefer to pick their partner on the basis of mutual interests and preferences which they want to share with that partner. Individualistic Doers are not particularly fond of effusive outbursts of emotion. They prefer to prove their love by their actions and expect the same of their partner. Whoever wishes to tie an Individualistic Doer to himself needs a lot of patience. It takes some time before this personality type is willing to get involved with another person.

Adjectives that describe your type
introverted, practical, logical, spontaneous, adventurous, resolved, independent, fearless, loyal, analytical, realistic, optimistic, interested, quiet, curious, circumspect, individualistic, action-loving, venturesome, cool, dispassionate, reserved, skilful, confident, independent, communicative, down-to-earth

Need for Dust

“Sometimes your heart is just broken down into dust. At times, though, it’s only dust that will put out certain fires.”

~ Imam Muhammad Abdul Latiff

Is there Love in an Argument?

Imagine a trivial incident: Your mate asks you to help clean up the house when you are watching TV or reading a book you don’t want to break away from. How do you frame this situation?

Ego frames it as “You want me to do something I prefer not to do. I’ll decide whether to give in or not.” Spirit frames it as “I see that you need me.” Notice that the outcome is not what is at stake. Whether or not the ego gives in, it is still framing the incident as a conflict. Its main concern is to keep power on its side, therefore it must win the conflict. Winning means either saying no and getting away with it or saying yes and feeling magnanimous. The aim of both outcomes is to avoid defeat.

Spirit has no such ulterior motives. It acknowledges the other person’s need, but it neither takes responsibility for that need nor opposes it. In this way the other person is seen as real, because whenever you need something, your need is your reality.

The only true need anyone has is to be seen as real.

A lot of the time we are lost in unreal needs. Your mate could be asking you to clean house for dozens of reasons. She may be angry or feel upset that household work is all left to her. She may feel demeaned, ignored, overwhelmed, anxious, compulsive, controlling – or she may just need help cleaning the house.

The absence of ulterior motives is what marks spirit. The neediness of an insecure ego doesn’t get disguised by other tactics. When you are in spirit you don’t feel the urge to manipulate, cajole, seduce, demand, beg, or insist. You simply allow, and in that you make an open space for love to flow.

Adapted from The Path to Love, by Deepak Chopra (Three Rivers Press, 1997).

Read more: http://www.care2.com/greenliving/is-there-mutual-love-in-an-argument.html#ixzz2JKJHWgGO

Welcome 2013!

Decisions. 
They are incumbent to sane living. Sane living with no regrets. And how steadfast we must remain to our decisions or we lose sight of the horizon. 

One thing gives for another. We make priorities and convince ourselves the best decision has been made. Giving up one job for another, giving up some time for one task over another event. Life in its wisdom, only brings us forward. And fate smiles upon us time and again, with the fair chance that we have moved in the 'right' direction - Forward. 

There are times I make my decisions fast and keep to them but more often than not, I do ponder back and forth on which decision to make. Seeking guidance from the inner voice may help but what if the inner voice is faint. Then we can't hear ourselves. Yet the decisions need to be made. 

I'm at the start of 2013 and having to make some important decisions. Mainly about work, choice of where to live, get own place or not, finishing the first book, settling down... My comfort is in the birds' chirps outside - constant and telling me it's ok. All decisions made will lead you somewhere. Just embrace the path. 

Allah (Alone) is Sufficient for us, and He is the Best Disposer of affairs (for us).”

 آل عمران‎ : Surah Al ‘Imran (3:173)