11 June 2011

Fifty years of a bitter-sweet union

They did it! Fifty long years of trudging along the marital path, of putting up with one another, of biting their tongue and being patient when the tendency was to just yell out at the other, of reminding themselves the bigger picture meant holding the fabric of the family together and staying together. 


Mom and dad celebrated their 50th anniversary this past weekend (June 2011) and I felt a glowing sense of pride and pleasure as I celebrated it with them. 


Their request had been simple - just a simple chaat* outing at East Coast Park. So we packed 2 flasks of chai, grabbed two picnic mats, some of my traveller-friendly cups, and off we went to the beach. We packed our own chai because the one served in public places is so sweet and if you say 'no sugar', it's so bland and bitter. So to satiate mom and dad's chai desire, we made it at home and off we went. I was blessed to have a car in those days and with God's grace, managed to find a parking spot close to the beach area so mom needn't walk for miles. 


I had invited my cousin Sarim along and he was then newly arrived in Singapore.  So it was fun! Sarim and I went to buy all the chaat samaan from nearby Komala Vilas. And as the beach became crowded, we dug into it and had a small family circle enjoying the sunset and the evening. As dusk overtook everyone's agenda, it was mesmerising to be at the beach and watch planes take off from Changi in the distance or ships on the horizon. Lovely evening light. Kids were flying their kites and several malay and indian families were coming out of the sea after casual play in the water.


Mom and dad, I'm so proud of you two. Despite all the difficulties we have all faced as a family, you have shown by example that patience, love, acceptance are powerful tools that hold the family together. Much more than Phds, career successes or money. I remain forever grateful to your persistence at life and its challenges. May we all learn a lesson or two from your example :) Ameen. 


May you always have health, wealth (of iman and daily existence), and rewards always and always. May all your duas be accepted and my love remains with you always. 


Thank you for your dedication and sacrifice!
Much love from your daughter     


*Chaat - a collection of South-Asian snacks often eaten at late afternoon tea time.

19 January 2011

Visions of Sham (Greater Syria)

I'm reminded of my trip to Syria (done in 2008), several times... often when I'm lost in my consciousness and out of the blue, the scenes would play themselves out, as if a button has been pressed. I had gone to Syria with a group of people gathered between the NUS Middle East & North Africa Society and the Al-Markaz Arabic Language school. I had attended a sufi music event at the Arab Association (a place I hardly step into) and was given a flier by a girl about this upcoming trip. While waiting for the music program to start, I was intrigued by this flier in my hand and the incredibly attractive cost for the 2 week trip (S$2250) including flights, shared accommodation and 2 meals a day! Even though it was with a group of people I did not know, the thought of 'when would I ever get to go to Syria' kept coming into my mind and I made a mental note to email the contact soon as I got home to see if they had any more places available.  


With all luck, there was space and i joined this eager-beaver crowd of mainly 20somethings on what probably remains one of my most memorable trips. 

Below are some notes i took while on our group bus and as we traversed through different terrains in our 2 weeks there. 



"There is a certain truth that seems deep rooted in these (pre)-Abrahamic lands, a truth that speaks to you. You may not even know what it is but it speaks to you. The mesmerizing landscapes evoke a chord that may have laid dormant for a while and as you traverse through the desert, you witness the sights, sounds, smells, and are subjected to an exercise that definitely 'wakes up' the soul. 

We go through our lives feeding our minds and bodies, inadvertently forgetting or neglecting the soul. The nourishment for which is often aroused when it visits ancient lands strewn liberally with a universal historical heritage spanning centuries of livelihoods and existence. 


The faint sounds of
qasidah which is humbling and touching -- Allahu-allahu-allahu-Allah (the incantation that goes up in pitch) and then Allahu-allahu-allahu-Allah (Going down in pitch) -- resonates with the temporarily forgotten chords residing deep within the heart. Now awakened ofcourse on no effort of mine; just by visual sights that awakens and speaks to the soul. Amazing. 
Credits to the handsome voice of Yusuf Islam telling us about the beauty of 'badru alaina' (the full moon appears up on us).


We visit the Castle of the Knights, locally known as Crac de Chevaliers and are amazed by the sturdy and overbearing architecture of centuries past. We become like little kids on a school trip examining the crevices, curves and texture of the columns, walls, fort platforms and wonder how war was carried out in the days of the past. We do this all in silence as each has their own mind working away trying to figure out meaning from what we saw. 


In our two weeks putting up near the Old City, we would frequent Ammara Souq* for food, and to buy things and to see the life of the locals. It led to Umayyad Mosque and the Al-Hamidiyah Souq. We visited the maqams (tombs) of the Prophet's (peace be upon him) wives, of Hazrat Bilal the famous first muezzin (the one who calls others to Prayer), of the Prophet's cousins, second cousins etc. 


We witness the marked site which reminds us of the Karbala Tragedy where in memory of the 19 heads which were sent back to the Muslims, there are 19 prayer skull-caps with Arabic inscriptions sewed into them. They are arranged in a neat display and looking at it, you are transformed to a time on how they must have been at the time of the Karbala Tragedy. It sends a chill through us. 


An image that stayed in our minds is the one outside Sayyida Ruqaiyah's Mosque. Everyday, we would see groups of shia muslims standing outside giving duas and observing a mini matam (breast-beating) sometimes. The women would be in all-black burqas and there were always more women and than men visible at this maqam. This is the site where the infant of Hazrat Husain was killed in the Karbala Tragedy and more information is at http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sayyidah_Ruqayya_Mosque


The visit to the black and white tiled Khalid bin Walid's tomb inside the mosque was another visual treat. The mosque was beautiful and the asymmetrical designs left us speechless. Beautiful clean outdoor courtyards where you could easily imagine the spill over of the ummah (congregation/followers) praying during prayer times and doves in conversation and flight creating a stunning scene.  


An interesting encounter that i witnessed in this mosque was when I was about to pray, there was a lady praying such that the tomb was right in front of her. It was purposely situated right at the back of the mosque so that people would not pray behind the tomb. A mosque official pointed her out to me as she was in prayer and I was about to begin mine and I wondered what he was doing in the ladies section so I was a bit alert in case the curtain barrier was being removed etc. But he just pointed towards her, shaking his head and when I let out an unintentional sigh, he briefly laughed and kept shaking his head. The point was, prayer is offered to God, not tombs but people have colluded the practice over the years, especially in countries where mosques house the tombs. If a person without Islamic understanding were to witness the lady praying exactly behind the tomb, they may think ancestor worship is condoned in Islam. 


Tombs are places for the dead where we give fatiha (short prayer used for several occasions). Prayer to God is in a mosque but without obstruction preferably; not in front of tombs.   
_____________

At the Souq...
What pleased me when I went to the souqs was the kind of respectful looks we received as we walked through the marketplace. Not cheap, not leary, not trying to thrust a sale down your throat. I felt if this was because not many international tourists came to Damascus, majority were from the Saudi and Gulf states. So the shopkeepers were not money minded.  



Palmyra was another stunning place we went to - ruins dating back to 1st and 2nd Century A.D. The stories that accompany the structures were vivid and alive. For a comprehensive reading on this heritage site, please refer to http://whc.unesco.org/en/list/23 "


There were so many other experiences but I can't list them all here. The kind people we met, the hospitality we experienced, the simplicity we witnessed and the purity of the souls in places which provide little entertainment, were all rich experiences for us. I am so thankful to the invite I received to go to the Arab Association for the sufi programme (Prof Syed Farid Alattas) and to the girl who thrust the flier in my hand and to the organisers who fit me in - so I was able to make this trip. SubhanAllah - you all were part of making this journey for me. Thank you. 


 * souq is a reference to a marketplace
_________________

Some pics can be viewed at
http://picasaweb.google.com/fmukri/SyriaTheSights02# and 
http://picasaweb.google.com/fmukri/SyriaTheLocals# and http://picasaweb.google.com/fmukri/SyriaTheSuakuVisitors#
 

17 December 2010

from Rumi's Mathnawi

"When the full moon shines on a clear night
What would it have to fear of the dogs or their barking?

The dogs continue to do what they are supposed to do
And the moon continues to beautify the face of the night.

A bit of weed floats on water
Yet the water does not lose its purity
Mustafa* splits the moon in half

While Abu Lahab utters silly curses.

Jesus revives the dead
While his enemies pull their beards put of hatred.
The sound of the dog never reaches the ear of the Moon

If that moon is a friend of God."


* Referring to prophet Muhammad, peace and blessings be upon him, whose other name is Mustafa, or the chosen one, and to his miracle of splitting the moon in half, as mentioned in the chapter 'The Moon' (Sura Al Qamar: 54) of the Quran.



From M J Rumi, Mathnawi "The Candy Seller Child (The Debtor Sheikh)".

27 October 2010

A traveller's farewell

a thousand words written
a thousand miles travelled
a thousand faces scanned
a thousand smiles felt
the heart records these
tacitly -
securely fastened by
the seatbelt of time

alas it is the hour
for the soul in flight
to fly... and
to return - inshaAllah
determined only by
the hands of fate
yet the written word of
the writer within
leaves beautiful memories
to safeguard and behold
farewell sweet land
i leave -
with a kiss of thanks.

~ Copyrighted by Fern

28 August 2010

The Leaf that Refuses to Fall

Your gentle smile, your softest of sighs
your quiet but steady footedness
the impatience to love boldly
the rebellion to behold...

the tinge of regret in me
announces a desire unmet
to live frivolously
as you often voiced
to not be afraid of
what anyone thinks

to live upon the wave of adventure
to dare to dream to take on
I take these lessons from you m'dear
in the hope of extraditing all fear

and as I choose to walk on my path
I fondly recall you, my tender half
for in my heart remains
a leaf refusing to fold
to the colour of fall
cos it stubbornly loves
your presence so and prays
in every similitude of hope
that your heart's mind
may chance this way again

alas alas a mortal wishes
mortal ends
for infinite Love is
beyond a beginning
and beyond an end
if only, if ONLY
our hearts' vision bends.

17 August 2010

Thoughts of a 20 yr old

This is from a journal entry written in uni days.

"There she was sitting on the edge
of the lowly built well -
whose curvature slightly resembling
the soft turns of her humble anatomy.

Peering intensely down
the depth of darkness
she feels desolate and disillusioned
weighed down to a hundredth of a fraction.

Conscience, her constant companion
had suddenly deserted her
and its rival- the unconscious
had impetously taken over

so there she sat
wide-eyed
throwing small round pebbles
watching the circular whirls -
a fixed gaze
not understanding
not wanting to understand...
those concentric circles
Make her head spin
round and round
and round... and round
Snap!
The monotony of the concentricity
is disturbed lavishly
a mynah has come to
quench her thirsty desire
and a soft feather falls -

the scent of the lush green grass
and the musical cacophony
of delicate creatures
emerge magically

The lively misé-en-scene
confronts her silence
how nature is so gay and free
displaces her desolation
and she wanders to another plane."

~ farheen Mukri

26 January 2009

Rumi's Inspiration


"There is a tradition that Muhammad said, 'A wise man will listen and be led by a woman while an ignorant man will not.' Someone too fiercely drawn by animal urges lacks kindness and the gentle affections that keep men human.

Anger and sharp desiring are animal qualities. A loving tenderness toward women shows someone no longer pulled along by wanting. The core of the feminine comes directly as a ray of the sun. Not the earthy figure you hear about in love songs; there's more to her mystery than that. You might say she's not from the manifest at all, but the creator of it."
~ The Soul of Rumi, Translation by Coleman Barks
Pic: Courtesy of Kirtida Mekani

01 September 2008

With Love from Capetown

I'm loving it! :)

Capetown that is with gail winds and all. On Sat the day after I arrived, there was top of the news of these bitter harsh winds - and boy were they strong. But hey I braved it - hahaha. And while getting blown away by the wind is not something I experience but it was fun :) Took pics of waves with water crashing down on the beach where we were all standing and the foam stretching its width and breadth all across the coastal road! Wow what a spectacle. Will have to put up the pics soon.

Meanwhile Table Mountain is covered with cloud mostly and every now and then the clouds will clear and the sun would peak out and give us a glistening view leaving one to ooh and ahh...
Durban was so different - far more peaceful weather-wise but also in my view a lot less exciting because of that. However I did spot a Bollywood shoot - seemed like a B grade movie..

And I saw several wonderful sceneries and game reserves and animals and skies that make your heart smile. Drove down to the rugged South coast which saw those magnificent waves as well - there was a place called Splash Rock - which literally splashed ocean water on this huge rock - wow and all the fishermen were carefully lining that edge of the rock.

Also saw this fascinating ritual of an African woman being baptised by sea water - she was all dressed in her white satin finery and other women and men stood behind and watched. The 'priest' then poured the gushing strong sea water on her as she held on to sand with shivers and courage written on her face.
I was also taken see a Zulu dance and the views of the vistas in the distance would every now and then distract me from the dancers... later the zulu women took pics with me :) Must upload. Someone pls remind me.

Here in Capetown there is a strong Malay community - but wah, so different from the Malays in Singapore, Malaysia and Indonesia. They all look similar but hardly know any Malay - or identify with the malay culture.
I have gone up to several Malay looking pple - finally feeling I cld recognise someon familiarity but alamak, they can't resonate back. Darn. Trying to get even a simple word like 'Makan' out of them is impossible! hahaah

But their houses very colourful - reminds me of the Melayu spirit around Hari Raya - back home. Have bought a book on the Malay Community here. They are called the Bo Kaap. (More like 'bo chap' if you ask me) haha. No offence. ;)
MashaAllah South Africa is a beautiful place.
I am returning next week to Singaland and things will resume I know... But I MUST write up proper travelogues of my trips with pics.

Must go. I send love and blessings of ramadan!

12 July 2008

Hujambo from Tanzania!

hujambo! - Sijambo ;) merhaba! Nzuri ... ;) these are the greetings you hear all the time - everyone greets everyone else when you pass them on the track/road etc.

I'm in Arusha now in a decent house so it has electricity, and a hot bath. And full meals.,
Out in the village i was struggling to get a fire going with firewood - refusing to use kerosene to help ignite as my training I felt had been to use it traditionally. And I'm proud to say i got a fire going, yay! hehe So happy - we cooked all our meals in this outdoor kitchen - which had a couple of windows but the squatting kind where you fan the flames within a stone etched 'stove' of sorts. There were two iron rods that can be moved on the top of the opening to allow a pot/saucepan to sit on. The secondary school boys and older who hung around our 'camp' would come and chat with us to practise their english - pretty good standard!

The village is called Mbaaseni (pronounce everything pl). And it's predominantly christian - lutheran. Distances bet villages and houses were long and I'm getting fit walking around everywhere. bicycles seem to be a luxury but am trying to get one. we have an oil lantern and candles and several torchlights. It's quite an exp. Just outside the house is a grave (marked with a cross) and on day 3 i noticed there's another one ( more raw) kinda perpendicular to it. It says RIP and a date of 2005 as passing date. The only thing is I have to pass this grave everytime i need to go to the outdoor toilet (dunny). It's creepy late at night cos no elec so you have to walk with just a torchlight and well you know the rest. So i'm trying to 'do my toilet' thing before it gets too late or drag a friend to stand outside the toilet while I am in there! hahaha See your dearest fudge is not so brave afterall.

The flip side of all this is the heartwarming smiles, acceptance of the villagers, mamas (older woman who are married&mothers - they are given a lot of respect in society) and the teachers and farmers who constantly help you along with your smattering swahili. It's fun to learn and similar to arabic! nice. :)

They grow lots of maize, banana, avocado (not ripened yet - darn!) and so many vegges it's pure joy to try out the salads. The bird life is fantastic! every morning i hear different birds - have heard the night jar. saw the Sacred Ibis (gorgeous stork like bird). oh and ofcourse forgot to mention that I've been seeing Kilimanjaro every day when it's clear. today is cloudy. But gosh when it is clear, what a magnificent sight! SubhanAllah - breathtaking.

The other nice thing is having made local friends - one in Dar es salaam who calls me almost every night to see how I'm going. She's an architect I met on flight from Doha to Nairobi. we clicked and may travel to zanzibar together. Another couple of friends in Arusha who are also volunteering and the big plus is I'm meeting my niece from Oregon here as she's spending her summer volunteering with me. After this email, we are walking down to Taj's Curry to have pani puri. Oh and there are so many yeendians here but very different from the indians back in SG. These are all 'africanised' hahaha they speak like africans and seem well blended in. At the border from Kenya to tanzania i saw some paki looking guys to whom I said salam to. There seems to be a pak community in Dar and Arusha too apparently as Ismail tells me.

20 June 2008

The Underwater World

My 4 day solo getaway to Lombok proved to be so different than what I had envisioned. No doubt it wasn't far from expectations but isn't it amazing how the human heart desires and what God disposes. And then we are only in a position to accept it. And work with it.

Kira Kira turned out to be a fantastic choice for accomodation - i felt blessed that even in my short time away i met someone there who spoke Arabic! Allahu bi rahmah - considering i had just done Level One exam for Arabic at Al Markaz and 2 days later was off to Lombok, without the girls (who had planned to go away wth me but cldn't at the last min) and voila there I was - smack middle of Gili Air (pronounced gheelee Aye-ir) to snorkel and dive and i shd have the fortune to meet Sofie. Sophie is from Lombok but looked chinese and dayak mixed. She had lived in saudi for a few yrs and could speak Arabic. Taka and Masako (both Muslims) shared with me her plight later. Sophie was 8 months pregnant and her husband had just left her a few months ago. She was a cleaning lady for some Japanese families in Lombok when Taka had met her and later decided to employ her at the resort to help her with finances. Ofcourse the worry now was how was she going to manage in her pre- during and post pregnancy phases. Late nights were not easy for her as guests would come in to the resort at any time and ask for tea/coffee and food. Even late night they cooked for us. It's business for them.

So Sophie and I became friends over sunrise walks - and practised our Arabic with one another :) Pure joy.

I have decided to organise some zakat from Singapore to be sent to her - Taka was telling me she wont be able to work with a few months old baby in tow. And she has no other form of income - parents dont have money/income, take money from her, husband doesn't give maintenance. (Typical of men in similar scenarios - i spoke to several island folk and found many cases were like this. They would be having affairs and mistreating their wives. Even the tour guide I had my initial contact with was telling me when I asked if he was married he said yes with two children but he didn't like going home. So he worked longer hours and 'fooled around'. When i asked him why he did that he said he was 'enjoying life'.) It's amazing how quickly i lose my respect for pple who say such things and with such casualness.

Later on Gili Air I met another person - a bar tender. I was walking on a hot day looking for Indonesian food. Came to the last hut where again on the menu i saw only sandwiches, chips etc... which I had no deisre to eat. The bar tender by then had asked me where I was from and said smthg which pleased me - he said "Welcome to my country". Usually having travelled in these countries where people yell out to you a nationality they think you are, it becomes tiring to be called 'India!' (i have given up explaining the Pak-Singapore connection). You take on a nationality! So when this guy didn't yell out a country to me, I actually turned and had a conversation with him. He also offered to get me nasi bunggus (local food, rice with small fish, some cabbage/veggies) and we talked about several things. One of which was on serving alcohol being muslim and he said everyone did it, everyone drank. I was surprised he would give me an answer as that.

So that saw the long conversation i had with this chappie extending into niat, actions, words, iman and you name it we went and discussed at great length. In the middle of all this a very senior man looking half-aboriginal, joined us. He shared how the local Muslims were on the island. The boss of the pub was a muslim man and the young chappie I was speaking to said it was required of his job to taste the cocktails before they are served. So he drank but 'a little'. Again our conversation stretched over many horizons. I wondered what the difference was in saying "I partook in a crime (I didnt really participate in the ___[eg rape] but watched from a distance)" and actually carrying it out. We talked abt what the main message was on alcohol. It was very clear. What is made forbidden for you, do not make it permissible. You can't mince that.

I told him he was such an intelligent guy i didn't see him as a bartender for long. He then shared with me his plans to run his own business with his brother - operating boats.

We talked more and the old man interrupted and said the night before he had a dream where he saw a girl talking to the young chappie over things that many others had tried to tell him but he wouldn't listen. Yet this time round he listened to this female. SubhanAllah i felt i was put in that situation for a reason.

3 days later that young chap had decided (entirely on his own) he was going back to Bali where his family was and fix up his business plans. He had felt some movement within him which is what I'm always hoping for in the young people i do the youth training workshops with - and alhamdulillah he had made some decisions for his own future.

Meanwhile my highlight of the holiday lay several meters under water - mashaAllah what a spectrum of marine life - every trip I make whether is it to the Perhentians (Malaysia), to Tunku Abdul Rahman Marine Park off Kota Kinabalu, Sabah (northern Borneo), or off Mersing (East of Peninsular Malaysia) i see different alive things and all sooo beautiful. This time I had the fortune of borrowing my friend's underwater camera and although it was my first time using it and had it firmly clasped onto me and around my wrist some of the shots are not so clear.

The homely turtle who swam in front of me for a good 5 minutes and i didn't lose sight of her/him cos it came surfacing to the top and going down again - sweet angel. All this time watching me from the corner of its eye :) it made me smile and I felt comforted in my heart. Like this we saw several other turtles - HUGE ones... but so unafraid of humans. Must be the tourist/traveller element.

And the myriad of fishes, razor fish, clown fish, silver fish, baby reef sharks then the marine lief - anemones, sponges, tubes, corals, nudi branchs... the list is endless. All so awe-gaping and wonderful.

After every underwater session it humbles you immensely to live above the land. We forget there is a life under there, all so teeming and active. Wonderful, mashaAllah.

Pics can be seen at the facebook link. http://www.facebook.com/album.php?id=609831819&aid=69188







Post script: 2010 - The young bar tender chappie had tried doing his boat business with his brother for 1.5 yrs and then returned to Lombok to get work again.

19 November 2007

The KL escapades

It’s sooo good to be in KL again! It is almost exactly a year since I was last here. Coming to KL is such a reality check for Singaporeans – this is real Asia. Malaysian tourism got it right first time round – Malaysia, Truly Asia. It hits you when you walk the sidewalks, skirt around loosely covered potholes with cardboard lids, puddles of water (err, water or urine? Err, we won’t go there!) in corners of buildings, crossing the road, stopping a bus/cab etc.


Clutching your friend’s arm when attempting to cross the road, and there are two ways to do this: 1) Asian style, walk as if it’s your grandfather’s road, without looking at the traffic (er u need to be brave and experienced to do this. Do not attempt this at home (I mean your home country) or 2) grabbing friend’s arm and tossing between do we or do we not cross now. This can be most frustrating when one person is trying to ape Option 1 and the other insists on Option 2.


One lil annoying development in SG to KL travels is along the way from SG-KL, the rise of the Malaysian market to cater to the Singaporean fancy! Yikes. I remember when I was in Secondary School, we would visit Malaysia and enjoy the fact that everything cost in RM and at M’sian standards. Now it’s in RM no less, but at Singaporean standards! Whyyyyy??Cos Singaporeans lay that demand forth – consciously or unconsciously. The rest-stop at Yong Peng is becoming SOOO Singaporeanised (and yes I’m aware Singaporeans own perhaps ¾ of the place), that today I noticed the entire crowd that was taking a pit stop there was non Malaysian. The locals don’t stop here anymore. See lah. Smart.


We had taken Gunung Raya (which although sounds Malay[sian], is probably SG owned as well). My previous trips have been on Malaysian coaches (by choice but it’s almost more leceh (troublesome) as u have to board them on the Johor side of the border. The Malaysian coaches stop at different pit stops than the SG ones… hmm. One wonders why. Not rocket science.We pay for the convenience and it makes market forces go up! Dang. I know for a fact there is a steady sizeable no. of Singaporeans who visit KL on a weekly basis. This has existed from time forgone. The links between the two belie their pre-generational bond. (Aside: I have written a play in 1998, which is set in the Yr 2000, predicting life of Singaporeans and Malaysians if a merger of occurred between the two. It’s a comical take on stereotypes of the two countries. As yet, unpublished. Any interest, email me and I’ll send you a copy!)


Besides the higher prices, the service seems to be going downhill, so different from the ‘asian way’ you get in Thailand, most of Malaysia (sans Johor Bahru!), Cambodia, Lao. I smiled at every service person I met and only got acknowledged glances from the coach drivers. The ladies behind the food service counters – forget it. But today in KL, in Nandos, and on the roadside Ayam Pangeng stalls, what a different world – Malaysians serve with a smile from the heart. Heartwarming.


We offered sweets to the lil kid behind us on the bus (Chinese Singaporean). U know what – as soon as my hand extended towards him, like any child he grabbed the sweets; but worse didn’t say thanks. I smiled at the childlike excitement and before I cld do the adult-policing thing, his grandma and mom both chucked lots of thank yous to me.. but I would have loved to have a thank you from the child (he was at least 6 yrs old!) Kids are the bane of a society. They tell us how well the parents are in their akhlaq (manner and conduct). I was in Australia camping for over a month and every child I met was taught good manners. Even in Pakistan, in the lift in shopping centres, children would be polite and speak to you with courtesy and respond! But Singapore, ha, you’re wishing for the world!


And we blame the education system. Com’on guys, not rocket science again.


Day 1 has been relaxing, taking in the city in small doses. My friend and I believe on a holiday one should do nothing. So we did that today - it was wonderful doing nothing. We got so much out of it :) More later.


20 Nov:
We have been having Rumi for company at our breakfasts and it's been wonderful! So heartwarming the poetry. Feel inspired by the writings and I cld so and should so use that urge to write snippets on observations etc. Will share some Rumi thoughts on Facebook perhaps :)

25 October 2007

Future Environment in Peril

http://news.sg.msn.com/topstories/article.aspx?cp-documentid=873932#toolbar

Save the planet? It's now or never, warns landmark UN report
File photo shows congested traffic on the 405 freeway in Los Angeles, California.  The UN has warned in its most comprehensive survey of the environment that humanity is changing Earth's climate so fast and devouring resources so voraciously that it is poised to bequeath a ravaged planet to future generations.

Humanity is changing Earth's climate so fast and devouring resources so voraciously that it is poised to bequeath a ravaged planet to future generations, the UN warned Thursday in its most comprehensive survey of the environment.

The fourth Global Environment Outlook (GEO-4), published by the United Nations Environment Programme (UNEP), is compiled by 390 experts from observations, studies and data garnered over two decades.

The 570-page report -- which caps a year that saw climate change dominate the news -- says world leaders must propel the environment "to the core of decision-making" to tackle a daily worsening crisis

"The need couldn't be more urgent and the time couldn't be more opportune, with our enhanced understanding of the challenges we face, to act now to safeguard our own survival and that of future generations," GEO-4 said.

The UNEP report offers the broadest and most detailed tableau of environmental change since the Brundtland Report, "Our Common Future," was issued in 1987 and put the environment on the world political map.

"There have been enough wake-up calls since Brundtland. I sincerely hope GEO-4 is the final one," said UNEP Executive Director Achim Steiner.

"The systematic destruction of the Earth's natural and nature-based resources has reached a point where the economic viability of economies is being challenged -- and where the bill we hand on to our children may prove impossible to pay," he added.

Earth has experienced five mass extinctions in 450 million years, the latest of which occurred 65 million years ago, says GEO-4.

"A sixth major extinction is under way, this time caused by human behaviour," it says.

Over the past two decades, growing prosperity has tremendously strengthened the capacity to understand and confront the environmental challenges ahead.

Despite this, the global response has been "woefully inadequate," the report said.

The report listed environmental issues by continent and by sector, offering dizzying and often ominous statistics about the future.

Climate is changing faster than at any time in the past 500,000 years.

Global average temperatures rose by 0.74 degrees Celsius (1.33 Fahrenheit) over the past century and are forecast to rise by 1.8 to four C (3.24-7.2 F) by 2100, it said, citing estimates issued this year by the 2007 Nobel Peace co-laureates, the Intergovernmental Panel on Climate Change (IPCC).

With more than six billion humans, Earth's population is now so big that "the amount of resources needed to sustain it exceeds what is available," the report warned, adding that the global population is expected to peak at between eight and 9.7 billion by 2050.

"In Africa, land degradation and even desertification are threats; per capita food production has declined by 12 percent since 1981," it said.

The GEO-4 report went on to enumerate other strains on the planet's resources and biodiversity.

Fish consumption has more than tripled over the past 40 years but catches have stagnated or declined for 20 years, it said.

"Of the major vertebrate groups that have been assessed comprehensively, over 30 percent of amphibians, 23 percent of mammals and 12 percent of birds are threatened," it added.

Stressing it was not seeking to present a "dark and gloomy scenario", UNEP took heart in the successes from efforts to combat ozone loss and chemical air pollution.

But it also stressed that failure to address persistent problems could undo years of hard grind.

And it noted: "Some of the progress achieved in reducing pollution in developed countries has been at the expense of the developing world, where industrial production and its impacts are now being exported."

GEO-4 -- the fourth in a series dating back to 1997 -- also looks at how the current trends may unfold and outlines four scenarios to the year 2050: "Markets First", "Policy First", "Security First", "Sustainability First".

After a year that saw the UN General Assembly devote unprecedented attention to climate change and the Nobel Peace Prize awarded to the IPCC and former US vice president Al Gore for raising awareness on the same issue, the report's authors called for radical change.

"For some of the persistent problems, the damage may already be irreversible," they warned.

"The only way to address these harder problems requires moving the environment from the periphery to the core of decision-making: environment for development, not development to the detriment of environment."

21 October 2007

A tribute to mom


It's mom's b'day today - 22 October. I called her and spoke at length - and she called back, a lil while later. Mother and daughter conversations never end. It's literally a love-hate r'ship we have. There are periods of absolute in-sync bliss and then a horrifying period of 'pls stay away from me' that I'll always wonder how come they even exist, when there is such understanding already established. I've learnt to leave it to human nature - anything is possible. No matter how one develops a relationship, whether it's with one's partner, lover, mother, father, sister, brother, cousin, friend, confidante - no matter how much you work at and weed the garden, a combination of factors can and will jog the dynamics to leave you quizzed.

But whatever it is, we do patch up fairly quickly. Or so i'd like to think. To me the period of not talking to mom seems like eternity - cos I can't imagine if smthg were to happen to either of us in that span of time, it would be a horrible way to face reality that we ended on that sore note. Yet I also know stepping back is often a way to let the other person breathe and be.

Today the conversation flowed easily - she was telling me the numerous things that were happening there on their side of the world. She was getting depressed from watching the news on TV, smthg Pakistan does little to censor. I keep thinking of the older generation that has lived through a couple of major wars (WW2 and the East Pak-West Pak war), how hardened they must be to see more mayhem and chaos in their land. how painful it must be to witness suicide bombings like a daily affair. Mom and dad have had their fair share of horrific stories.

I shared with mom that she shouldn't watch the news all the time - it's depressing. How dad keeps himself active, and hence I feel his spirit is lighter, whereas mom sometimes gets too caught up in the intensity of what's going on, and lets it affect her. being woman, i guess she lets it affect her way too much emotionally. Dad and bro + sis in law are more on the mainstream path in that they have a public life and a personal life. Mom's life meanwhile is restricted (as I see it) to keeping house and maintaining peace in the home (SIGH~ what an enormous task!)

One of my intentions to get her to come here was to be away from all that responsibility. Although she wasn't that happy by the middle of her stay here, i cld see she had adapted to the 'holiday' mode and was enjoying catching up with her friends here and relaxing. Mom enjoys reading a lot - she sometimes reads till 2 am or whatever time she falls asleep at. There was once she was reading at 3am when i quietly came home after a late night out. Aha, probably just waiting for me to return safely. Such is the silent expression of a mother's love.

I had sms'd dad early this morning a) to remind him to wish her (haha) and b) to make sure she doesn't have to worry abt dinner tonite. Dad replied that he had already wished her at midnight ;) not bad! Actually dad usu is good with mom's dates.. i have to be fair. ;) Wonder what they did for dinner. Have a weird feeling that cos I'm not there, to insist on order-in or dine-out, it prob may not have happened. Hmm, will sms bro to find out.

Among the things i was sharing with mom were the new developments I plan to embark on - smthg mom has always been supportive in and shared my excitement in. Smthg I have to add is rare - cos when I share these anecdotes with my friends, almost none of them have the same "sharing r'ship" with their mothers and they wonder why i bother telling mom so much. Hmm... 'bother' never entered my vocab, but i'd say, i do it out of a bond - a connection to my heritage. After all if we can't connect to our own flesh and blood, what does connect mean then anyway? Ok so it must be rare - cos i share with dad too - completely different things of course. And dad responds in such different ways than mom.

But the chapter on dad shall be reserved for the much awaited book (get your ass cracking on it fudgeo!)
M'while here's wishing you the best of the year, mommy dearest and I pray that you receive love, peace, tranquility, patience and support in your life, everyday. InshaAllah. I send my love to you and hope you will forgive me for the small silly lil things I say that have caused you unnecessary hurt.


12 October 2007

Goodbye Ramadan, Hello Eid

Children respond to love. They see not race, age, appearance. It's a simple response - to the Love from within. To Acceptance. When the child's heart connects with ours, you know you have hit home! :) God bless lil children. My last two weeks of Ramadan allowed me to get into that fold of society we (Internet-accessible generation) normally hear about vaguely but not have much to do with. I saw these wonderful children in Lengkok Bahru, one of Singapore's poorest areas.

Every year i would make some calls to find out where to best part with my zakat. There was a year I remember I went to great trouble just to transfer money to a theatre-journalist in Ramallah, Palestine. Soon after I had transferred the money, the place was bombed... I always wondered if the zakat money ever reached her. It was for the lil children who didn't have enough as their families struggled with day to day necessities.
(Update: a few months ago, a theatre group from Jordan came to Singapore and i went to watch the play. I went with my Palestinian friend Nadia. After the play, Nadia wanted to meet the cast - it had been a powerfully moving play so we spoke to the organisers and asked to meet the cast. After the usual 'suspect' mentality, [read:'what exactly do u want to do with our cast? kinda looks] we were allowed to meet them backstage. In the socialising, witnessed closely by local Singaporeans (i wondered why they hung around, so protectively) and the exchange of cards, I discovered the cast members knew the journo I had sent my zakat to, many yrs ago. The most relieving news was she was alive and well and still doing theatre for the many traumatised children of Ramallah, Palestine. I was so comforted and conveyed my salaams for her. I know somehow my zakat had reached her. The yr would have been 2001.]

This year I got a phone call telling me there was a family of 10 surviving in a tent by East Coast beach! Ouch. Unable to pay their bills for over 3 months, they were evicted. Dad earns $400 a month and mom is having a worrying anxious spell of sickness. Sigh. Out of 10 kids, 2 are passed to mom's sister, so now 8 kids and their parents are in the tent. So some zakat went to this family.

Another case was a single mother with 2 small kids who had been living out of her niece's home (niece was married and had a spare room) for almost a year while her divorced husband refused to pay maintenance or move out of the flat she had paid for. So a year later, she manages to get her own place, a small one bedroom appt. I went to visit and pass some zakat. Walking into this mature estate was very telling. The people hanging around the shops below stared at me even before I approached the set of flats. They cld tell I was not from there. All these blocks are one room flats. I often wondered if it was a good idea to park all the one room flats together... After all, one person's dirty linen would soon become public laundry... hmm.

So my eyes were opened to the throes of Lengkok Bahru. I had gone past it before but never thru it. Now I know. and so many people live in these one room appts. Families, mind you not successful singles.

The passing of Ramadan was an emotional time ~ like the moments before maghrib when the last light of Ramadan leaves - ouch, i felt so heavy, and just 5 minutes past 7pm (just after maghrib) i broke down and cried uncontrollably. Couldn't figure it out. Cried and cried... so sad, so heavy, like I hadn't done enough - the month had come and gone.

There was no mood to celebrate. Well Allah connects to all his creations in mysterious ways. The takbir had started, in all the mosques, then the thought, that all over the world, at maghrib that day, the same takbir would be recited in throngs, in groups, wow the gell of the brotherhood.

The explosion of emotion continued... i cldn't do much else, except cry and feel connected to Allah - an hour later, I managed to find inner calm. Spoke to a few friends... and it was comforting. I had intentioned to go to the makham of Habib Noh the next day for Eid prayers. And I was glad I did - went with 2 other friends. It was a moving service. Choked with emotion, the imam and then respectively the congregation responded to the soulful call of remembrance of Allah, the oneness, our deeds, conscious living, and reciprocity of our actions.

During the Eid sermon, something the imam said made me silently intend to visit the elderly home where the Muslim ederly folk wd be marking eid as well. So after the Eid prayers, a friend and I headed to Jamiyah Elderly Home in West Coast. What was to await us there was beyond expectation. My friend decided to donate her zakat there while I had bought some food stuff to be distributed. But arriving there, we had taken so long that it was just past midday and it was lunch time. The two nurses on every floor were taking turns feeding the residents. The natural thing was to offer to help. And we did. I ended up feeding lunch (it was bubor) to a 87yr old lady. It was so humbling, I had to hold my emotions back, as I wiped extra food bits that wd stick around her lips. Like feeding a baby, only thing was this lady would keep asking "saya nak kopi. Saya nak biskut". They had fresh watermelon juice and she drank all of it. We couldn't communicate much except I cld see she was hungry. She needed to be moved in her sitting position and held. every now and then she looked into my eyes. It was very touching. Obviously she was not allowed kopi+biskut. her bed tag said Diabetic. I wondered how not even on Eid or any other day, wd they be given what they desired.

Upon retrospection, there are things u let go off and move on, and there are things you love, hold and value. And u still move on. Then there's purification within. U cleanse and live, cleanse and live. Everyday a renewal process. Life within is your only reminder that change is continual and that time is temporary - all else will fade as well. That this whole existence is meant to just last an appointed time. Ira said smthg recently, that stuck: that all that is created will be destroyed. How very true. The fact that it was created means it will see an end. So do we then not believe in eternity? is that just a concept? For this life, I'll take it as temporary and has an end.

But here's food for thought: As long as we can think it, imagine it, visualise it, then it's possible and will/can happen. So if we can imagine eternity, then it can happen. However since we have seen how everything comes to an end (life & death), nothing is for permanent then eternity is not for this life...

Hmm, your thoughts and comments are most welcomed :)

28 August 2007

Nisf'u Shaban

At 5.49am, I listened to the Azan. I had just had the pre-dawn meal - for the sunnah (optional) fast. Every cell in my body responding to every syllable in the azan. Wonderful. This was a consciousness my mind, body and soul liked. All 3 focused on One.

What a wondrous morning it is. Past 6am, the morning birds are beginning to make themselves heard. I often wonder at the way birds wake up. Surely they must have some quiet down time (like being awake and not yet making noise) ;) Lying in their nests, acquainting to the slow but sure dawning of the morn'. The skies turning from black to grey, then to blue in a matter of seconds. And then one bird, just one bird, decides to be the First one to break that silence. And slowly another and another ... and another follows.

Nisf Shaban is possibly the most significant day for me, every year. It's a day when we can focus and pray on what is planned for us in the forthcoming year. We can ask for unfavourable things to be changed. Remarkable. If the concept of pre-destination is true, then how can anything be changed? This was a question i had asked when i was 17. And found out the answer then, that, those possessing Faith, know that God/the Power of the universe is fair and that when giving choice, also gives us the ability to ask and seek. When the heart seeks; the body, mind and soul work as One. But then there is a fine line between merely seeking and sincerely seeking. I've learnt to see the difference between the two in the recent years. Very fine line. Sincerely seeking, implies wanting action/change/ movement in one's thinking/life. Most of us are just merely seeking - we don't necessarily act on what we learn. We don't make change in our lives, in our systems. We no doubt share with the people around us, what we are seeking. And this tells everyone where we are at. But at a personal level, to make that change, is quite an effort in itself.

Like deciding to become vegetarian. A vegetarian person makes an effort.
Or deciding to give up something - an addiction - (drugs, prostitution, alcohol, smoking weed/drags).

I was also thinking abt the ever increasing number of atheists in Australia - don't know why i thought of it quite suddenly but it was a stark realisation. I remembered how most of my interactions with people in Oz were with agnostics or atheists and how our conversations often centred on Mercy/Grace - where it comes from, how we survive or are saved in the nick of time. I remember one particular abseil we did in Uni days. It was in Australia - a 5 day trek over 7 peaks. They were called the Stirling Ranges. Parts of it treacherous, cos it was so windy and for southeast Asians, not used to the harsh bitter dry wind, we were tested right thru the journey. There were moments when we traversed on mountain edges, our hearts in our mouths, looking down steep caverns, gorges, bends - 200m, 70-80 degrees above sea level. Phoa. I nearly lost my footing once.. or twice or three times... each time, Grace or Mercy catching me, in the nick of time.

How this happens to all of us...our fates change, in that second. Why?
Nisf Shaban marks that ability of fate to change.
Y'day's fast felt wonderful. It was full - wholesome. I woke up this morning half hour before I was supposed to get up, cos I think my soul knew it wanted to get up and not miss the alarm. Funny how that happens. U just know and u just do.

Y'day incidentally was also the lunar eclipse. Cos it rained so hard all day, it was overcast in Singapore and I watched the whole spectacle online (Thanks to Discovery channel!). Here's alink if you're interested:
http://www.spaceweather.com/eclipses/gallery_28aug07.htm

It was awesome - nice red moon, as observed from Southern Cross Observatory, Queensland, Australia.

I'm now looking fwd to Ramadan - abt 2 weeks from now and to more fasting :)

If you've written on the lunar eclipse, pls let me know. I'd love to read of your observations :)

12 August 2007

About life passing - by J Green

This poem was shared with me by a dear friend Anthony Green on the passing of his beloved parent. It captures life and living and bonds so well, that I had to share it. 

About life passing

We live
as drops of water
dancing
in a broad river
delighted, 
careless, 
sure of the life
and the movement
and the surging
and the presence
of it all

Absorbed
absorbed
we one day come to feel
our fathers
and our mothers
older than we knew them
feel hints of loss to come
and death, 
and silently taste the passing
of friends we knew
and names we spoke
stand outside houses we could once enter
and look up to see
ourselves
closer to endings
than beginnings

And now we watch our lives
borne onwards
and begin to feel, too, those hints
of so much that has passed
and so little
and taste emptiness
and sense a failure to have built
some small part of all that might be
or might have been
before that river that we were
floods out
as it has always,
into the great sea beyond.

~ Anthony Green, 2007

10 August 2007

Lessons on Life

I got this in an email and yes I've received this many times but such a useful lesson to be reminded of every now and then.
:) Enjoy


Lessons on Life


There was a man who had four sons. He wanted his sons to learn not to judge things too quickly. So he sent them each on a quest, in turn, to go and look at a pear tree that was a great distance away.

The first son went in the winter, the second in the spring, the third in summer, and the youngest son in the fall.

When they had all gone and come back, he called them together to describe what they had seen .
The first son said that the tree was ugly, bent, and twisted. The second son said no it was covered with green buds and full of promise. The third son disagreed; he said it was laden with blossoms that smelled so sweet and looked so beautiful, it was the most graceful thing he had ever seen. The last son disagreed with all of them; he said it was ripe and drooping with fruit, full of life and fulfillment.The man then explained to his sons that they were all right, because they had each seen but only one season in the tree's life.

He told them that you cannot judge a tree, or a person, by only one season, and that the essence of who they are and the pleasure, joy, and love that come from that life can only be measured at the end, when all the seasons are up.

If you give up when it's winter, you will miss the promise of your spring, the beauty of your summer, fulfillment of your fall.

Moral:
Don't let the pain of one season destroy the joy of all the rest.
Don't judge life by one difficult season.
Persevere through the difficult patches
and better times are sure to come some time or later.
Pic: Lake Saiful Maluk, Northern Areas, Pakistan (Hindu Kush Range)